I've come to the conclusion that the reason I don't pour my thoughts on to this digital landscape is because I'm kind of a stickler for grammar and formatting. I find it hard to arrange my naturally occurring thoughts in that format. Some of you may be curious enough to excuse it, but I'd feel dirty. :)

Or maybe I'm just a slacker.

I used to think it was because I didn't have anything to say. I'm glad to know I was wrong.

Maybe I'll give it a try some time anyway.

I Thought I'd give this post from IM thing a shot. I started my new job as a programmer at Capital Newspapers on Monday. They gave me a 17" macbook pro, and it's been so impressive in its performance that it even inspired Dale to buy one. His is a lot better than the one work gave me, but I'm probably going to be forced to buy one for myself when I have the money available. Anyway, things are good, and since I can post this from Adium, I can post foreign languages using my plugin, so 私のメッセージで終わる。いくつかの時間後に再びかもね。 :)

Why? Do the companies conspire to release everything I need to own within a few short weeks of each other? Let's take a look at the list.

• Patapon February 26th


• R-Type Command (AKA R-Type Tactics) March


• God of War: Chains of Olympus March 4th


• Wild ARMs XF March 11th


• Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles:Ring of Fates (DS) March 11th


• Condemned 2: Bloodshot March 11th


• Super Smash Brothers Brawl March 9th


• Okami (for the Wii) March 25th


• CRISIS CORE: FINAL FANTASY VII March 25th

I don't even remember the holiday season being filled with this many games that I actually wanted to play.

Apparently this thing didn't post my angsty rant about being miserable.


Things have moved on since then. I did get my car. It rules. I did some voice acting for Combine Nation which I'm really unhappy with. They had me voice three characters, then went with someone else for one of the characters, and removed another of the three from the episode altogether (which would have featured my awesome black man voice) and only left in the redneck Alien, Jerry which was the worst voice of the three. IRRITATING. Oh well. Something tells me doing voices for internet shows is not the way to break in to the voice acting industry.

Lots of drama involving getting out of our current apartment. Very lame. Our landlord is a douchebag. That's about as in-depth as I'll go on that topic.

Spent the holidays in Montana with Elise's family. That was neat. We drove out there in the new car, which was surprisingly pleasant and not a chore at all. We even brought our cat out there sans-carrier and she was an angel (which makes me wonder why the little fucker has suddenly decided to switch that demeanor by eating my fucking wiimote covers.)

All in all, life is good. Oh yeah, and my buddy Dale moved in with us from Florida and just got a job as a perl developer. *points and laughs* Wait... He's making $12 more an hour than I do. Fuck, maybe the joke's on me.

**EDIT** Looks like it did post...Why the hell did LJ tell me that I hadn't posted in my journal and asked me to recover the previous draft when I logged in? YAY BUGGY LJ.

So this is where I'm supposed to spill everything near and dear to me out on the wide world intarnets.

We'll see how that goes. Previous attempts of mine at keeping a journal have been complete failures, but as I sit here at work, I feel like I have a whole lot to say. I just don't know how to say it all. Or if it even matters.

Oh well, here goes...

Everything's been awesome with Elise. I couldn't ask for a more perfect match for me. I always want her around, and I'm always happy to be with her. We're getting a new car because my Kia is a piece of crap, and it's about time to replace it. I'm really excited about it. It's a 2002 Audi A4 3 litre 6 speed. I kinda know what that means... We're getting it for a really good price.

On the work front, I love my job, but I have a tendency  to call off too frequently, and it's making me feel like shit. I really don't want to lose this job. I'm really happy here, and love everyone that I work with, and the opportunities that are available to me.

I still have a mountain of debt to take care of, but getting a new car will take care of a portion of that (in getting a new car, it will take what's owed on the current car and zero it out.)

Overall, I find myself still feeling a bit lost, though. I feel like I'm not doing anything. Like I'm not going anywhere. I really would like to go back to school, and would prefer to attend Digipen, but it feels so out of reach right now. I feel like every single day is just going to be another day. Like I'm walking on a treadmill. It's kind of depressing. I just keep feeling like I'm not enough.

I hate money. I wish there was a way for me to just do exactly what I want to do, and make enough money to start from scratch. To get a house, eliminate my debt, move wherever I want.

Now it looks like I'm not going to be able to get the new car (recent development since I started this post)
Life pretty much sucks right now.